>> guest: i wrote the hoboken the year the first four months everything i wrote was terrible. >> host: are you being hard on yourself? >> guest: it was really bad. i took it to a writing group on send was lucky because i didn't think of myself as a writer. i was trying to learn to write. it wasn't part of my identity when they said this was terrible set i know. of course it is. i'm not a writer. tell me how to make it better. that was a wonderful place kazan no personal feelings about it as all i literally never wrote a story before so is a great place. >> you journaled for a good portion, talk about the journals that you have. >> couple journal entries when i say but i got serious about it at ten. i have a whole stack. >> summer difference a lot given to me by my grandmother and they tend to have a picture of jesus on them. almost all of them up to the age of 16. other than their black. >> for me it's about i don't think i understand something until i write it down, why were you doing it? >> i think there is a bit of loneliness. sometimes i detect they didn't have any friends. there