♪ oh your love is a melody underneath me running to me oh your love is a song ♪ ♪ your love is a song oh your love is a song your love is strong with my eyes wide open ♪ ♪ i've got my eyes wide open yeah i've been keeping my hopes unbroken ♪ ♪ yeah yeah oh your love is a symphony

all around me ♪ ♪ running through me oh your love is a melody underneath me running to me ♪ ♪ your love is a song yeah yeah ♪ ♪ your love is my remedy oh your love is a song ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: nice job, guys. thank you, gentlemen. thanks, guys.

[ cheers and applause ] i want to thanks my guests, diane keaton, "morning glory" is the movie, kevin mchale from "glee" -- kevin, thank you buddy -- nice job. switchfoot -- monday night, russell crowe will be here. "jimmy fallon" is happening now. have a great weekend, everybody. bye-bye. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ]

captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com >> jimmy: hey, everybody. thank you so much for being here. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. happy friday. did you hear this? hillary clinton met with israel's prime minister benjamin netanyahu for six hours at a hotel yesterday. [ light laughter ] when hillary saw that she had a six-hour meeting at a hotel, she was like, "wait, i think this is bill's schedule. [ laughter ] this isn't mine. it can't be mine, i think i -- it is mine." [ cheers and applause ] speaking of bill clinton, today he released a statement where he called george w. bush's new memoir "well-written and interesting." [ laughter ] then bush released a statement calling clinton's lie "convincing and much

appreciated." [ laughter and applause ] there's some big international news. gap just opened its first store in china this week. or as gap clothing put it, "we're coming home for the holidays." [ laughter ] i was just reading about this. a lot of pest control companies are offering bedbug sniffing dogs. but it turns out that they're not very reliable. either that or there's a serious bedbug epidemic in other dogs' butts. [ laughter ] it's one or the other. >> steve: other dogs' butts? oh, they -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: listen to this, everybody. animal control discovered a woman here in new york with 50 cats in her two-bedroom apartment. [ audience ohs ]

that's insane. i mean, how can a crazy cat lady in new york afford a two-bedroom apartment, right? [ laughter ] this is just bizarre. a man in connecticut was shot twice at a deli but went home to eat his sandwich before going to the hospital. [ laughter ] both he and the sandwich are being called heroes. [ laughter and applause ] [ cheers ] thank you. check this out. one of apple's oldest computers is expected to go for about $200,000 at an auction. that's probably not the best purchase, though, because you know that they're just gonna come out with a new oldest computer in three months. [ laughter ] so you might as well just wait for that one. a woman in florida is suing her former boss for firing her because her breasts were too distracting. i think her lawyer was distracted, too. he wrote in official documents that said they're suing for "1 million bazoombas." [ laughter ] yeah.

>> steve: hay-oh! >> jimmy: that's what he's suing for. >> steve: how much? >> jimmy: it's on the court documents. >> steve: how much was it? >> jimmy: 1 million -- [ laughter ] and finally, the rockefeller center christmas tree arrived in new york city today, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] that's right! the tree's here. i don't know about you. i'll just be happy to see something get lit in new york, other than charlie sheen, so it's gonna be really exciting. [ laughter ] you guys, we have a great show. give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ >> jimmy: whoa! [ cheers and applause ] that is def leppard guitarist phil collen right there, sitting in with the roots. [ cheers and applause ] phil, thank you for being here, buddy, and hanging out with us. appreciate it. >> thank you. >> jimmy: we have a great, fantastic finish to the week tonight. my pal, the always hilarious, tracy morgan is here tonight! [ cheers and applause ] so good. that's hot. one of the all-time great talk show hosts, my man dick cavett is joining us. [ cheers and applause ] he's got this new book out called "talk show." look at this. you got a blurb from woody allen and then a blurb from jimmy fallon. [ cheers and applause ] that's what i'm talking about. i'm a blurbist. my first blurb. love dick cavett, man, he's great. fantastic. so psyched to see that guy. and a little band, the kings of leon are here. i don't know ever -- [ cheers and applause ] you ever heard of them?

the kings of leon! come on! [ cheers and applause ] they're gonna destroy. they're gonna blow your pants off. it's gonna be great. >> what a show. >> jimmy: i love the kings of leon. they -- i actually did some acting with them once. it was a show called "slappington manor." you guys -- fans? [ light laughter ] it was -- played a bunch of times. it was a couple times. i think it aired four episodes. >> four? yeah. >> steve: four good -- >> jimmy: they play a bunch of dudes running a bed and breakfast together in connecticut. it's a great show. i think -- [ laughter ] i think we have a clip. ♪ >> jimmy: "slappington manor." time for some rest and relaxation. >> can we help you, sir? >> jimmy: hi. i'd like a room, please. >> you've come to the right place. [ slap ] [ laughter ] >> would you prefer smoking or non-smoking? >> jimmy: non-smoking. [ slap ] [ laughter ] >> king bed or queen?

>> jimmy: king, please. [ slap ] >> you're all set. if you could just sign right here. >> jimmy: no problemo. i'm so excited just to get away from it all -- [ slap ] two seconds. [ slap ] [ slap ] [ slap ] i wanna just -- [ slap ] [ groan ] [ melodramatic music ] >> get out! [ soft music ] >> jimmy: guys, i'm sorry. it's just, i -- sometimes i just -- i just like -- i don't know -- i just -- i don't know. [ laughter ] you know? >> i know. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: friends? >> besties. [ laughter ] [ slapping ]

[ laughter ] >> enjoy your stay. >> jimmy: i sure will. i can't wait. >> your bags, sir? yeah -- whoa, whoa -- don't -- wait for your tip, buster. [ rapid slapping ] [ maniacal laughter ] [ laughter ] ♪ slappington manor [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy thank you to kings of leon for doing that. [ cheers and applause ] they're good guys. and speaking of thank yous, today's friday and that's usually when i catch up on some personal stuff. i check my inbox, return some e-mails and, of course, send out some thank you notes. i'm running bit behind. so i thought, if you guys wouldn't mind, i'd like to write out my weekly thank you notes right now. is that okay? [ cheers and applause ] do you mind? thank you so much. roots, can i get some thank you note writing music?

♪ oh, man. [ laughter ] god. [ coughs ] [ laughter ] you okay, buddy? yeah. [ laughter ] ♪ thank you, shampoo, or as i like to call you when i run out of soap -- soap. [ laughter ] [ applause ] ♪ thank you, david beckham, for announcing plans to launch a new line of men's underwear. we've seen the pictures. and if you guys out there want to "bend it like beckham," it's to the left. [ laughter ]

>> steve: you liked that one -- >> jimmy: -- i don't know. shouldn't have done that. >> steve: thank you. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, large cold sore on my co-worker's lip for making everything they say sound like "cold sore, cold sore, cold sore, cold sore." [ laughter ] ♪ thank you, haters, for giving rappers so much to talk about. [ laughter ] ♪ thank you, salad spinner, for being the perfect washing machine for my barbie doll clothing collection.

[ laughter ] ♪ thank you, cave drawings, for proving my theory that humans are incapable of drawing horses. [ laughter ] you see the lips on that horse? awful. >> steve: proves your theory, there's one. >> jimmy: thank you. ♪ thank you, electrical outlets in australia, for making me feel like i'm plugging my hair dryer into the mask from "scream." [ laughter ] hello? [ laughter ] ♪ thank you, guy refilling your giant, two liter poland springs bottle at the water fountain while the rest of us wait.

[ laughter ] don't you know this fountain's for sippin', not for preparin' a two-day hike up mt. douchebag. [ laughter ] walk it off, buddy. walk it off! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ jimmy: thank you, self-doubt, for being -- no, it's stupid, forget it. [ laughter and applause ] ♪ thank you, former president george w. bush, for calling kanye west conway west this week -- [ laughter ] during an interview with matt lauer. conway west. sounds like someone just got himself a new country western persona. [ laughter ] ♪ now, i ain't saying she a gold digger but she ain't messin' with no broke, broke ♪ ♪ i ain't saying

she a gold digger but she ain't messin' with no broke, broke ♪ ♪ go down girl go 'head, get down ♪ >> get down! ♪ get down, girl go 'head, get down ♪ >> get down! ♪ get down, girl go 'head, get down ♪ >> get down! ♪ get down, girl go 'head, get down ♪ ♪ i ain't sayin' she's a god digger ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, thank you guys! thank you, everybody. we'll be right back with tracy morgan! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ host: could switching to geico really save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance? do woodchucks chuck wood? (high-pitched laughter)

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: ladies and gentlemen, it's time once again for "won't you pop my balloon?" ♪ ♪ won't you pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon ♪ ♪ i've been walking round town in this crazy, crazy world now i'm wondering ♪ ♪ if you'll pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon say -- ♪ ♪ won't you pop my balloon i've been walking around town in this crazy, crazy world and i'm wondering ♪ ♪ if you'll pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon ♪ ♪ i sing like a trombone round and round and round and i'm wonderin' if you'll pop my balloon ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

♪ won't you pop my balloon say, won't you pop my balloon i went into a j. crew with 47 dudes ♪ ♪ and now i'm wondering if you'll pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon hey -- ♪ ♪ won't you pop my balloon obama says he won't give on the tax cuts for the rich now i'm wondering ♪ ♪ if you'll pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon hey, won't you pop my balloon i met a walrus man ♪ ♪ and he told me not to lie and he asked me if i'd pop his balloon ♪ >> jimmy: come on. here we go. ♪ [ balloon pops ]

[ cheers and applause ] >> damn, jim. [ laughter ] that's all i had going for me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: just joshing, old friend. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ won't you pop my balloon say, won't you pop my balloon i'm traveling on down in this crazy, crazy world ♪ ♪ and i'm wondering will you pop my balloon won't you pop my balloon sir -- ♪ ♪ won't you pop my balloon i'm traveling on down in this crazy, crazy world ♪ ♪ >> steve: this has been "won't you pop my balloon?" [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ turn the tub around

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah. welcome back, everybody. you know our first guest tonight from his work on "saturday night live," numerous feature films and his emmy-nominated work on "30 rock." he's got a new stand-up special

called "black and blue" airing tomorrow night on hbo at 10:00 p.m. he is so, so, so funny. please welcome our pal, tracy morgan, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ chased a demon's lightning that burst inside your eye [ humming ] take a doo doo pie ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> that's a doo doo pie. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what was the name of that character? >> uh -- woodrow. >> jimmy: woodrow. >> woodrow. he never hurt nobody. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, woodrow -- it was a character he used to play. he lived in the subway. >> yeah, inspired by ghostface. >> jimmy: yeah. oh, is that right? >> yeah, ghostface did a skit on one of his albums called "supreme clientele" and i just got that and i said, "woodrow." and we came up with woodrow. >> jimmy: yeah. i remember you were talking to a block of wood. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and he'd go, "buy, sell, buy, sell. ha-ha. funny money."

>> -- happy face, sad face that was my first attempt. we laughed at a guy that lived in a sewer. [ laughter ] tragic. he lived in a sewer and you laughed at him. [ laughter ] that's tragic. insight provides us with the proper guidance. i don't know what that means but it sounds intelligent to white people. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, that's pretty good that -- >> sounds intelligent to white people. >> jimmy: it does, it does. [ laughter ] >> insight provides us with the proper guidance. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] my quest to sound really intelligent to white people. yeah. like, if i'm in a group of white people, i say, "insight provides us with the proper guidance." they go, "wow." >> jimmy: yeah, he's pretty deep. that's pretty deep. >> deep. >> jimmy: yeah. hey, thanks for helping me out with "won't you pop my balloon?" i appreciate that. that was you, wasn't it? >> that was funny. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that was good. i appreciate it. you picked out that mustache. [ coughing ] >> yeah.

excuse me. [ coughing ] it's kinda cold in here. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: drink water. drink water. drink water. sorry. that's vodka. that's vodka -- what if that was your thing? you just coughed after every joke? [ laughter ] you're the guy that coughs -- you don't remember hamburger? you know that guy? >> hamburger. >> jimmy: yeah, hamburger, he'd say after every joke. maybe you cough after every joke. you tell a joke, then you go, "that's good -- [ coughs ] think about it. it could be something. >> people be actin' like i can't cough. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, but you can't cough for like three minutes straight. >> i cough -- yeah, i cough in public sometimes and people go, "he's coughin'." [ laughter ] sometimes people get crazy sometimes, like, i went to fedex the other day and --

i have old eyes and i'm a vain actor so i don't wear glasses. 'cause i'm vain, so i went to fedex and asked the guy, you know, "i can't see this, could you fill this out?" 'cause i was sending something away. and i said, "could you fill this out for me?" he said, "sure." so, he took the paper and he said, "what's your name?" and i said, "tracy morgan." he said, "i know that." i said, "so, what you askin' me my name for?" [ laughter ] 'cause my name is tracy or -- like on tv -- and they think that's a character all the time. >> jimmy: yeah -- >> i said, "no, my mother really named me tracy morgan." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. do you have a middle name? >> no. >> jimmy: just tracy morgan? >> yeah, i call him tracy "cough" morgan. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're adding "cough" after this? are you m.c. cough? you could. >> we was down in d.c. >> jimmy: we went down to washington d.c. i just saw you. tina fey is -- >> you looked so good, man. you looked like a republican. [ laughter ] you looked good. you was dressed like a republican. >> jimmy: thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. it was a fun night.

tina got a -- got a mark twain award. >> that's my girl, man, that is my girl. >> jimmy: this sunday, it airs. you should watch it. tina fey. >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, she's great. >> you know, but -- hey, we was looking good out there, jimbo. >> jimmy: well, you looked good. you looked great too. >> jimbo. yeah. >> jimmy: me and you. >> if you was still on the market, you could of got picked up. >> jimmy: yeah. [ cheers ] i could have, yeah. >> yeah, i'm on the market now. >> jimmy: oh, really? [ cheers and applause ] >> my girlfriend put me on waivers. [ laughter ] i'm like randy moss, but another team will pick me up. [ laughter ] all i gotta do is be like brett favre and e-mail my junk to women. [ laughter ] i'mma e-mail my junk to women. i'm workin' with the nfl on that, though. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: are they gonna figure it all out over there at the nfl? >> yeah, figure it out. >> jimmy: they should -- you know what we're talking about? remember this in d.c. is "star wars." you're a big sci-fi fan. >> yeah. deep, down inside, you are too, i see it. >> jimmy: yes, that's what you kept telling me. >> yeah. [ laughter ] you -- >> jimmy: i think i am. i mean i do -- i love "star wars." >> you remind of me 3-cpo.

[ laughter ] it was love. people don't understand that when they was on the ice planet. that was the thing between -- you know what was missing? >> jimmy: what? >> -- in the last three "star wars"? that relationship between obi-wan -- no, between -- [ laughter ] han solo -- >> jimmy: yeah, han solo. >> -- and luke. that was love, man. it was deep because -- you remember when luke skywalker -- the ice monster? >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> hit him. and he fell off his -- [ laughter ] and then -- and then hans solo was trying to get leia -- >> jimmy: uh huh. >> and she called him a scruffy little herb nerder. [ laughter ] a scruffy little herb nerder. and then -- >> jimmy: a herd nerder? >> he went to where the hangar was, where the fliers was and he said, "has anyone seen lieutenant walker?" and they said, "no, he hasn't returned yet." and he said, "well, why doesn't someone go find him?" and then he went to look for luke skywalker, but he hadn't returned.

>> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> and he was on his -- and the guy -- and the soldier says, "you'll freeze before you hit your first marker." and hans solo said, "well, then i'll see you in hell." [ laughter ] that's love! that's love! [ cheers and applause ] "well, then i'll see you in hell." >> jimmy: god. that is -- i didn't think about it. >> that's love! >> jimmy: i didn't think about it at the time. >> and then, 3-cpo -- the doors slammed -- and he said -- he said, "r2 has been known to make mistakes." and then the door slammed -- "from time to time." and i said, "oh, god!" [ laughter ] >> that's what they missed. >> something that happened to luke 'cause luke kept messing around out there. >> jimmy: yeah, he was screwing around. >> obi-wan kenobi come out of nowhere. "luke, don't go over there." and luke go over there. [ laughter ] if you got a ghost telling you not to do it, don't do it, holmes. you ahead of the game. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're ahead of the game. >> you're ahead of the game. you got obi-wan coming through. [ coughing ] >> jimmy: you have a ghost telling you what not to do. >> yeah! >> jimmy:

just listen to the ghost. >> see, his name -- see, regular white people call him obi-wan. black people call him "obi-wann." [ laughter ] "that's obi-wann! yo, obie! yo, what up?" >> jimmy: no one ever said that to obi-wan kenobi. >> yeah. >> jimmy: hey, i got to say -- because, gosh, i love and so -- happy for everything that's happened to you. an hbo special? >> yeah, it's goin' down, brother. >> jimmy: you did it, pal. >> it's goin' down. >> jimmy: that is awesome, buddy. congratulation. that's legendary. [ cheers and applause ] george carlin, eddie murphy, billy crystal, dennis miller, chris rock, ellen degeneres, robin williams, joe piscopo. >> it's goin' down. i can't believe it and i remember it -- 18 years in the making for me to just get to that point. and i remember when i first started doing comedy, like 18 years ago, like, i got onstage and then, the next week, i said, "i'm ready for a special." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. you've have five minutes of stand-up and you're like -- >> 'cause i got five minutes, you know? so -- but -- >> jimmy: the five-minute hbo special with tracy morgan. yeah. and it's just five minutes of good comedy but here you are. where you, at the apollo? >> i was at the apollo.

and it was so different 'cause i had the did carnegie hall the year before that. and there's a difference in cultures. you know, when you do it in front of, like, an all-white audience, if you're not good, they will just like -- "what's going on?" and, you know -- [ laughter ] that hurts. the silence hurts. see, i can fight back if i get booed. you know, i can fight back. i can respond. i'm -- in my mind, i'm like, "okay. they don't like me." because that's how black people do. if you not -- if you corny, we let you know, like the first 30 seconds. [ laughter ] "boo!" and i was on stage at the apollo the first time i did it and i got -- i bombed. >> jimmy: oh really? >> i thought i was the joint. >> jimmy: did you get a whomp whomp? >> and i bombed. and i -- yeah. [ screeching ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> and it started from the corner, up in the corner. like, this fat, light-skinned chick started booing me. and then everyone started doing -- and i looked over and the sandman --

'cause they got the sandman -- >> jimmy: sandman comes out with a broom? >> yeah, he came -- he was stretching -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you go, "uh oh, that's bad, he's trying -- getting' ready to do something"? >> yeah. then i looked over in the corner 'cause they and this hook. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. >> he was screwing the hook together. >> jimmy: no -- yeah, no, no. that's when you gotta get out. >> he was getting' it ready for me. >> jimmy: tracy morgan, everybody. we'll be right back with more with tracy and talk show legend dick cavett. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ male announcer ] at e-trade, low cost investing doesn't just mean a low price. it means getting everything you need to invest for yourself, not by yourself. it means choosing from stocks, bonds, mutual funds, and every etf sold. plus 5-star service and research designed to increase your intelligence, not insult it. so you can wave good riddance to some high-priced joker churning out cookie cutter portfolios. price is one thing. value is another. don't confuse the two. e-trade.

investing unleashed. playing black ops yet? yeah. it's awesome. i got it at walmart at midnight. me too. i just stole a russian... hind attack chopper. you couldn't steal a russian attack tricycle. look you better call in some backup reinforcements, man... backup?

...because i don't go down easy. out of the vehicle. i won't be taken lightly. don't need backup... can do it all by myself. your problem is, i don't respect you because i've played you man and you got nothing on me. [ male announcer ] rated m for mature. get call of duty: black ops. the best way to play is xbox 360. the fastest way to play is walmart. save money. live better. walmart. the fastest way to play is walmart. i can take one airline out... and another home. so with more flight options, i can find the combination that gets me there and back quickest. where you book matters. expedia. nah. we have something else. but if you're hurt and miss work does it pay cash like aflac does? nah. or let you spend it in any way you want like for gas and groceries? nah. or help with everyday bills like aflac does? nah nah nah. [ male announcer ] there's aflac and there's everything else. visit aflac.com for an agent or quote.

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♪ ♪ came in last night at half past 10:00 ♪ ♪ that baby of mine wouldn't let me in ♪ ♪ so move it on over ♪ move it on over ♪ move it on over ♪ move it on over ♪ move over, little dog, 'cause the big dog's movin' in ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] a dog & a chevy, what else do you need? ♪

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is an award-winning talk show pioneer, comedian and actor. he's also a gold medal pommel horse state gymnastics champion in nebraska. and the author of his latest book "talk show," which is in stores right now. pick it up or go onto amazon and check this out. it's a great book. please welcome back to the show the great dick cavett, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ my dick late night god your dick shape type -- odd ♪ ♪ ay yo, my dick is like the new john lennon yo' dick is a page like kenneth ♪ ♪ my dick's got much success yo' dick's stuck on tbs ♪ ♪ ay yo, my dick's got multiple emmy's yo' dick serves peoples at wendy's ♪

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you had to do your signature -- i never thought i'd see dick cavett moonwalk in my life. >> i am so sorry i ever gave that to michael jackson. i can't -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: really? he did well with it, though. >> he did. you know, i knew michael when it was the jackson five. my earliest show on abc and this group came on, and one night, at "rocky horror," somebody yelled, "do you know michael jackson?" and i said, "yeah, i knew him when he was -- black." [ laughter ] well, am i getting away with that with you? >> yeah, yeah, yeah -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you see me wince a little? no, but -- you never look better than in that ladies unitard that you had on. >> tracy: thank you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> that was something. was that suit padded in any way? >> tracy: no. [ laughter ] that was all me. >> oh, i meant in the shoulders. >> tracy: no.

>> jimmy: he meant in the shoulders. >> what did you think i meant? oh, well. >> jimmy: congratulations on this book. look at this -- is this your second book or third book? >> well, there was a book called "cavett," then there was one called "eye on cavett," years after that. this one is a collection of my blogs from "new york times online." there's still some squares who say, "i can never find you column in the paper." well, partly because it's online. >> jimmy: it isn't on paper, yeah. [ laughter ] you have to download that paper and print it out if you want to see it on paper. >> isn't it funny that i'm sitting here, eight feet probably from where i made my first television appearance when jack paar brought me out to translate for miss universe. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: this is right. you were here in this studio. >> tracy: wow. >> jimmy: what year was that, exactly? >> that was -- that would have been about 1962, i think it was. yeah. >> jimmy: a lot of history in this studio. >> and -- absolutely. >> jimmy: is it true that jack paar -- >> well, my greatest ambitions involving this area was i wanted to be a page at nbc.

>> jimmy: i love the page system here. >> they turned me down. >> jimmy: why? >> that was last summer. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: -- that's why. you can't -- >> no, but seriously. >> jimmy: i can get you in. did you want to be a page? did you? no. >> i feel awful when i lie to you. >> jimmy: no. did you really? you can do it. you're a funny guy. >> i -- as people say, i just want to say -- i would like to say how proud, in an almost fatherly way, i am at how you have grown in this job. i'd like to say that. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: don't make me cry. don't make me cry. >> now -- [ laughter ] you see how i had to go for the cheap gag of adding, "i'd like to say." >> jimmy: yeah, you'd have to say, but you'd like to though -- >> because it makes me jealous. >> jimmy: but in the meantime -- you were the first phone call i got when i started this show. i was about to go on and someone -- it was the morning of and the phone rang. somebody said, "jimmy, dick cavett is on the phone to talk to you." i go, "are you serious?" and it was really your voice.

i didn't know if it was someone who was impersonating you or -- >> oh, did you -- did you think that was me? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: probably someone at howard stern playing a goof, yeah. unbelievable. >> okay. >> jimmy: but, no -- but you -- i like the story that you tell with the -- when you have jack paar 'cause the reason you got the job on jack paar is 'cause -- from what i know, you chased him, you followed him into a men's room. >> well, it's sort of like that and it was a quick pile of coincidences. copy boy at times. $60 a week. someone leaves a newspaper open. "jack worries about his monologue." i went home, typed a monologue, came down to the sixth avenue entrance and luckily, there was no security in those days. anybody could come up to the sixth floor. i knew jack taped here. here we he came down the corridor. i said, "i've written a monologue for you." and if that had not happened in those series of coincidences, you would be talking at an empty chair. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i would just have an -- "space" on. i would have air on tonight. >> yeah, wondering where i was. >> jimmy: -- as a guest. the other thing i want to ask you about too -- you have so many great interviews.

if you get the dvds of dick cavett, hollywood greats, the comedy greats. you have groucho, bill cosby. i mean, amazing, great legends. lucille ball, jack benny. there's also some really like, interesting ones -- marlon brando. >> well -- >> jimmy: you had him -- >> that was the damnedest night of my life. [ light laughter ] having him on the show was one thing. it was a little difficult. and said, "did you know 'the godfather would be such a success?" he said, "i don't want to talk about movies." [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: "oh, bummer. 'cause that's all i have to talk to you about. you're marlon brando." and he doesn't want to talk about movies? >> so i said, "did you enjoy the book 'the godfather'?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that is the best answer. i would have done that, yeah. and then -- >> and then, that night, there was a minor incident in which marlon, as he said i could call him 'cause we're both from nebraska, broke paparazzo ron galella's jaw eight inches from my face. >> jimmy: i remember that.

where were you? >> chinatown. where else? >> jimmy: yeah, you were in chinatown, going out to a restaurant or just barhopping or what? >> yeah, he was looking for an old -- [ imitates marlon brando ] "i wanna find an old restaurant i used to know." and so, we were walking, galella came up. paparazzo -- marlon said, "which one is galella?" there were two. and, he got galella to lean in as he said -- [ as brando ] "don't you ever get tired of taking the same picture all the time?" and i thought, "uh-oh." i've seen, in two brando movies, i've seen what's called a "slip punch." and galella leaned in and -- "don't you ever get tired of --" bang. a shot that was heard 'round the world. >> jimmy: really? >> galella went into the air a bit and came face down on the hood of a car without putting his hands down. >> jimmy: wow. >> no stunt man could do that bit, i don't think. >> jimmy: oh my god. he broke his -- >> and he broke his jaw, yeah. years -- months later, i asked him about it. he said it was "the best $26,000 i ever spent." [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: we got to take a break. more with dick and tracy when we come back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ you could never deliver this much power in a space this small until now. introducing the craftsman compact right angle impact driver. delivering powerful torque, and greater control in the tightest spaces more innovation. more great values. craftsman. trust. in your hands.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, sir. thank you. i'm back here with the great tracy morgan. he has a stand-up special on hbo this saturday. and the one and only dick cavett who has a great book called "talk show" out right now. thank you, guys for hanging out and chatting with me. >> have you ever had your family tree traced? >> jimmy: no. >> i did. it's great. >> jimmy: really? >> turns out dick tracy and i are related. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're kidding me! >> tracy: i'm his uncle. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh my god. i have you -- i have you in an interview -- interviewing the jackson five. >> and that's a vanished show. it's gone. you have the only correct copy. >> tracy: i have a copy of you interviewing them, and they were talking about how they played spaceball with you. and something they used to play in disney world or whatever. and marlon just kept saying the word spaceball, and dick was sitting there and marlon said, "yeah.

uh, we play spaceball with you." [ laughter ] 'cause this is how they used to all talk. soft. "we play spaceball." [ laughter ] >> i thought it was john wayne who said that to me. [ laughter ] [ imitates john wayne ] "they want to play spaceball"? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: marlon was doing that? >> don't we make a hell of a team? >> jimmy: i mean -- really do. you guys have to go on the road. but you really -- i've never seen that. i've never seen that jackson five on there. you had so many good bands on there. john and yoko. you ever see that one? >> tracy: no, i've seen the one -- jimi hendrix. >> yeah. >> tracy: my father was a musician, and he was a combination between rick james and jimi hendrix. we used to call him rick jimi. [ laughter ] >> that's very melodious. >> tracy: rick jimi. >> jimmy: rick jimi, absolutely. >> did you see the moment when i said to hendrix, "are you very disciplined? do you like to get up every day and work." he said, "well, i try to get up

every day." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's a pretty good line right there. if you guys want to hear more fun stories or read more fun stories, you gotta pick up this book. it's my man, dick cavett, right there. tracy morgan. [ cheers and applause ] thanks for hanging. kings of leon when we come back, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: welcome back. our next guests are one of the most popular rock 'n' roll bands in the world. their new album "come around sundown" was just released. here with the song "mary," please welcome kings of leon. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ mary, if you want to i'll wait my ride

i'd be on the corner just passin' time ♪ ♪ no i won't never once make you cry just to kiss ♪ ♪ oh and i'll miss your good-bye ♪ we'll go to the disco ♪ ♪ we'll be desired

oh and we'll dance like we're good friends it's sheer delight ♪ ♪ no i won't never once make you cry just to kiss ♪ ♪ how i'll miss your good-bye ♪

♪ ♪ no i won't never once make you cry ♪ ♪ just to kiss oh and i'll miss your good-bye ♪ ♪ ♪