♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, to protect and serve in a divided america. we're with one police department in savannah, georgia, training officers on how to de-escalate stressful situations. >> this is kind of important to break us out of our comfort zone. >> and the former cia officer-turned-detective taking lessons learned overseas to help build bridges at home. >> the concept of the community is how we have our. the former bachelor tells all to abc's robin roberts. >> tell us what's on your heart that you want to share. >> i'm gay. >> colton underwood, the highs and lows of his journey and his message to a former flame.

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♪ good evening. thank you for joining us. tonight, a renewed wave of protests for racial justice, forcing law enforcement across america to reflect and re-evaluate their oath to protect and serve. one police department in savannah, georgia, doing just that. teaching officers skills that do not include a service weapon,

but rather, involving empathy, heart, and understanding. >> someone's at the bus stop! >> reporter: what you're watching is a special acting class. >> there's somebody at the bus stop! >> reporter: that group on stage is working on an improv drill. one meant to teach observational awareness. and that man is a police officer. officer anthony watkins is with the savanna, georgia, police department. for him, this is training. >> it was stressful. i was sweating by the time i was done. >> as police officers, we're always taught to be that authority and that figure that is taking charge on scene. and wanting to move it in one specific direction. i think as far as what i'm learning today, this is just not my comfort zone. but even being in this class for a short time is just pushing me to work and operate in a way

that i would never have thought before. >> reporter: his training comes amidst a restless week in america. a week where yet another police officer, kim potter, stands accused of shooting a black man, 20-year-old daunte wright. potter was arrested and booked into jail today, charged with second-degree manslaughter, released later on bond. >> there are two levels of policing in this country. one for blacks, and one for whites. >> reporter: the pain and anguish, the outrage, over repeated incidents of minorities dying at the hands of police. at times during calls that began as nonviolent incidents. cause causing police departments nationwide to self rft, re-examine, in some cases retrain how their officers handle situations with the public. >> you've said most officers get 50 hours of firearms training, less than 10 hours in de-escalation training.

>> the reason why that's problematic is because when they're in the field, they encounter the exact opposite. 9 of 10 calls for service have nothing to do with violence at all. we are oftentimes seeing police officers escalate situations themselves. so what we have to do is to create training that speaks more to social interactions. speaks more to officers creating what they call time and distance. so that they can make more objective decisions. >> reporter: for officer watt since, attending this class known as "trauma drama" enhances his training, helping him better communicate and better understand his community. >> once you have that personal connection, it kind of creates a bond where a more peaceful resolution could be achieved. >> going offroading today! >> reporter: it's all part of the savanna police department's new behavioral health unit which launched in the aftermath of george floyd's death. >> we looked at statistical data, specifically back in 2019.

we responded to about 3,700 calls for service that were not related to criminal acts, but were related to individuals in some type of mental crisis situation. what was really needed for those calls for service was for those individuals to be evaluated by a clinician, to be connected with resources, and for them to have the opportunity to have some type of follow-up plan put in place to reduce recidivism for those types of calls. >> reporter: the unit is made up of two nonuniformed, unarmed officers and a licensed clinician. the choice of attire a deliberate one. >> we're in a more laid-back uniform that is kind of designed to make people feel more comfortable. the uniform that i'm wearing today what is i wear on a daily basis. we're trying to stand apart from the rest of patrol because we're trying to get there and calm the situation down and get people the help they need. >> reporter: the savanna p.d. says creating the behavior unit

has allowed them to enhance their service while reducing the need for unnecessary force. >> prior to having this behavioral health unit, you would take the person to jail. and now we have more options. when we tell them that we're, you know, taking a person in for treatment or taking a person to a mental health facility rather than jail, most often than not, they're pretty happy with that. >> i think people are realizing that reform is no longer an appropriate word. instead we need to start thinking about transformation. what we've been doing over the past quarter century or so simply is not working to address the racial disparities that we see in policing. >> if i'm afraid that i'm going to be murdered at every single second of the job, and i'm always operating in what they would call a koed red, always on high alert, that is toxic mentally, toxic physically, toxic to the profession of community policing. if i'm afraid of my neighbors, then i'm going to react fearfully.

>> reporter: changing an officer's mindset is something savannah detective patrick skinner has been championing for years. >> i think that the conversation has become more open and more urgent, i guess. there's an obvious need for police reform. a lot of departments are trying to make that. >> reporter: before rebasing in georgia, skinner served in the middle east. >> i was in the cia for 7 1/2 years, stationed in the counterterrorism center. >> reporter: his experience there left an impact, especially where their tactics came up short. when he returned to his hometown of savannah and decided to become a police officer four years ago, he says he saw much of the same. >> we wanted, you know, to get the sunni community on our side in anbar province, iraq. that's impossible. but when i came home to savannah and started seeing that same rhetoric here, get the community on your side, we need the african-american community, we need the hispanic community on our side -- i could understand quickly, that doesn't make any sense. >> reporter: skinner was outspoken in what he was seeing as a beat cop, quickly gaining

public attention in his community and around the country, speaking out in articles and on social media about community policing and the importance of being a neighbor. in his department, he began introducing ideas like the importance of how officers use language. including the term "civilians." >> when you start dividing it in a language, very structured, civilians versus cops, then it does an us versus them. even subconsciously it's going to happen. >> reporter: he preaches rolling down the windows while driving around, something he learned to do in the cia. >> i waved at everybody. it tells you, he's engaged. i'm looking for the briefest connection. the window's down, an easy way to do that. you can hear and see everything. there are no small acts of kindness or connection. and we just need to not pass them up. >> reporter: it's that view of your community as neighbors and not threats that skinner hopes will become more and more a part of an officer's mindset and training, not just in savannah, but across the country. >> we have a warrior mindset that is taught. it's taught a lot.

zero empathy. zero compassion. zero understanding. and the goal is compliance. i don't like that warrior mindset, because again, it's an us versus them. it's a really aggressive us versus them. the consent of the community is how we have our job, and they have a say in how we do our job. >> reporter: as the nation grapples with another death in yet another family grieving, one can only wonder, measures like these are enough? >> law enforcement is like being a pilot or being a physician. you have to be perfect. we need our law enforcement to be above reproach. we also need to give them the resources to be able to get to that point. >> no one's perfect. >> yeah, no one's perfect. but this is the thing. there are certain professions where you pretty much need to be. because when you mess up, then someone loses their life. >> a heavy responsibility. coming up, gay and proud. the former bachelor in his own words.

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year's been a lot for a lot of people. and -- it's probably made a lot of people look themselves in the mirror and figure out who they are and what they've been running from or what they've been putting off in their lives. and for me -- i've ran from myself for a long time. i've hated myself for a long time. and i'm gay. and i came to terms with that earlier this year. and have been processing it. and -- the next step in all of this was sort of -- letting people know. still nervous. but -- yeah. it's been a journey for sure. >> through the nerves, i can see the joy. >> yeah. >> i can see the relief. >> i'm emotional, but emotional in such a good, happy, positive way. >> yeah. >> i'm like the happiest and healthiest i've ever been in my

life. >> reporter: but getting to this point was a dark and tumultuous road. >> i got to a place where i didn't think i was ever going to share this. i don't -- i would have rather died than say, i'm gay. and i think that was sort of my wakeup call. >> did you ever think about harming yourself? >> yeah. there -- there was a moment in l.a. that i woke up, and i didn't think i was going to wake up. i didn't have the intentions of waking up. and i did. and i think for me, that was like my wakeup call. i'm like, this is your life. take back control. >> reporter: colton underwood, a former professional football player, was introduced to the world as the bachelor on season 23 of the franchise, surrounded by beautiful women, all vying for his affections. >> you're cute. >> i literally remember praying. praying to god the morning i

found out that i was the bachelor. thanking him for making me straight. i remember that vividly. of saying, like, finally you're letting me be straight. finally you're giving me a wife, a fiancee. then i'm going to have the kids, then i'm going to have the house, then i'm going to have althis. >> reporter: colton's virginity was an essential part of his season. >> everyone knows that you're a virgin. >> yeah. >> so i want to know, why? >> one thing about being labeled the virgin bachelor is, i fully was a virgin before that. and i could never give anybody a good enough answer of why i was a virgin. the truth is, i was a virgin bachelor because i was gay. and i didn't know how to handle it. >> reporter: now, 29 years old, colton says he'd struggled internally for much of his life. >> i've known that i've been different since the age of 6. and i couldn't process it. and i couldn't put my finger on what it was until high school. my freshman year. when i knew i was gay. i was more attracted to boys and men than i was the women and the

females. >> reporter: as a football player and a devout christian, colton felt he needed to deny his sexuality. >> i had already grown up in the catholic church. i have gone to catholic grade school. i had learned in the bible that gay is a sin. i had made mistakes in my sports, in my athletic career. when you make mistakes, "that play was gay," gay affiliated with a consaying of negativity. i hated myself for being gay. >> reporter: after living his entire life as a heterosexual man, he came out to friends and family this past year. >> i've had sort of a range of responses. the underlying, most common one was almost like "i wish you would have told me sooner." when i hear that, i wish i would have had faith in my friends and my family a little bit more. but i think they also understood why. they grew up with me. my childhood, one of my best

friends, she was like, "i've been waiting for you to tell me this." she's like, "the bachelor sort of threw me off but i've been waiting for this conversation." she broke down in tears. my dad, i told him. his reaction was sort of the same. "i wish you would have trusted me sooner." then he followed it up with, "how can i help you? how can i help take this off your plate? who can i tell?" to me, that was more meaningful than "i love you." >> reporter: his father by his side in new york for our interview. >> i'll share with you what my mother said when i told her, and i was worried, as you, being very involved in the church, how can you be gay and also a christian? and she said to me, "god loves you because of who he is, not because of anything you do or don't do." i'm grateful for you having the courage. because you know there's probably a young person, maybe a young football player, who's listening to you. colton says he is now at peace. >> i got closer to god this year. i used to wake up in the morning and pray for him to take the gay

away. i used to pray for him to change me. and i can now wake up and pray to god, and i can actually have faith, and i can go into church and be present. >> reporter: the former bachelor admits he hurt people along the way, specifically his now ex-girlfriend, cassie randall, who he famously jumped over a fence for on the show. >> colton! >> open the fence, guys. open the fence. >> were you in love with cassie? >> yes. i mean, and that only made it harder and more confusing for me. i would just say that i'm sorry, from the bottom of my heart. i wish that i would have been courageous enough to fix myself before i broke anybody else. >> reporter: their volatile relationship ended last year. cassie filing and then dropping a restraining order against him. have you talked to her at all about this? >> i don't know if i ever will get the chance to sit down and talk with her. i would like to. i would like to say sorry for

how things ended. i messed up. i made a lot of bad choices. i made mistakes and ended that relationship. i ruined the good memories we had by my actions and what i did to hold on to being straight. because i didn't want to look myself in the mirror. so for that, i'm extremely, extremely sorry. >> reporter: now unburdened by his secret, colton is taking his new life day by day. >> i still haven't had like an emotional connection with a man. i've never allowed myself to. i want to more than anything. i'm still looking to be a dad. i never knew you could be gay and a dad. and i found that out this year as well. i found a lot of the things out. >> what's next for you, colton? >> life. i mean, i get to breathe. i get to take all this weight off my back and my shoulders.

i get to publicly and outwardly be happy and be me. all of me. >> our thanks to robin. if you or someone you know might be struggling with thoughts of self-harm, you are not alone. the national suicide prevention lifeline is always open. 800-273-8255. for free, confidential assistance. up next, the surprise welcome committee for one woman celebrating a major milestone. oh, it was terrible. i was totally stranded. no tp? nope, empty roll. so what happened? well... we started buying charmin super mega roll. whoa! that's huge! charmin super mega roll is 6 rolls in 1 and lasts so much longer you don't always have to worry about the roll running out. i'm glad you were rescued, dad. me too. it was a huge relief.

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♪ finally tonight, walking all over cancer. >> i'm done with chemo. i did six rounds. >> asia patterson of tulsa, oklahoma, marching with new purpose, finishing her final round of chemo, given the surprise of her life. family, friends, and her entire support system coming out in force to celebrate their super woman. >> oh my gosh, i love you guys so much! >> good for her.

another note, we have a new member of the family here at abc news. today, kim godwin was named the new president of abc news. her selection is historic. kim becomes the first african-american woman to head a major television news network, ever. an accomplished tv news executive and journalist with nearly 30 years in the business, a proud graduate of florida a&m university, we join the nation to say, congrats, kim. welcome home. strike, strike, and strike again. that's "nightline" for this evening. catch our full episodes on hulu. we'll see you right back