tonight, bill murrary, misty copeland and american ballet theatre. and music from ryan adams. brought ot you by cigna. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fuggetaboudit, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, guys. i appreciate it. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show.

thank you very much, i appreciate that. we are coming out all this week. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, thank you. i appreciate it. please, please. as they say in church, please be seated. we're at the howard hillman opera house at the brooklyn academy of music. allow me to say, without question, this is the worst-dressed grouppf people house. thanks for lining up in the cold to come see us tonight. we're very happy to be here. this is our second time in brooklyn. 2012. i like to drop by every now and then to remind you i'm not just in the back of your cab, i'm a real person too. i was born in brooklyn, i grew [ cheers and applause ] most people in brooklyn don't even know where that is. brooklyn. i went to ps-236.

school? i have to say, brooklyn really hasn't changed since i left. it's still the same collection mom and pop, gluten-free artis natural shops that made brooklyn what it is. i grew this beard especially for you guys. [ cheers and applause ] around brooklyn this weekend, there are more beards here than in afghanistan. we're all going for a flea and tick dip after the show. we have a very good show for you tonight. we have music tonight from ryan adams -- [ cheers and applause ] this is brilliant. ryan adams recorded a whole taylor swift album. he took her album and did it over. he's going to sing from that tonight. if that isn't enough, and it probably isn't, the incredible bill murray is here. [ cheers and applause ] i have a request. i wawa to ask you to pleasee be nice to him even though he's a

he's going through a hard time right now. bill was at citi field for the game, i was there too. any new york mets fans here? [ cheers and applause ] last night the mets took a commanding 2-0 lead in the series, they jumped on top of the cubs largely thanks to a very strong and perhaps unforgettable pitching performance from this guy. [ lalahter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that really hurt my back. i threw out the first pitch. that was all i threw because my agent didn't want my pitch count to go above 1. fy threw out the first pitch and

do i get a world series ring? i feel like i should. [ cheers and applause ] that really was a dream come true. i wish i worked on my facial expression when i was throwing the ball. some of my friends sent me pictures. this is what i call pitch face i think they call it. it's not just me. ththe's bill murray's pitch face at a cubub game. this is jerry seinfeld in the zone. cubs fan mr. t. looks like he's halfway through the word "fool." representing the mets, former jets coach rex ryan. the bottom half of his body is being consumed by an alligator while they took that. the problem is widespread. by the way, what do you think of your set, is it not lovely? live [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: massive. it's a lot of work moving a show from l.a. to brooklyn. i want to thank our crew.

they spent so much time last week trying to figige outow t t ship medical marijuana there. and they built this set too. it does seem -- there's something missing from the set, right? there's a -- actually, where -- oh, i know. guillermo, where's guillermo? [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmymyall right, thank you. guillermo -- >> guillermo: hold on. but -- >> jimmy: all right, all right,

all right, all right. have you been having fun here in brooklyn? >> guillermo: yeah. a great time. >> jimmy: less is more already. i'm going to tell you something. guillermo was out drinking. what time did you finish drink is louisiana night? >> guillermo: 3:00 in the morning. >> jimmy: what time did you call your wife and say, good night, i'm going to bed? >> guillermo: i forgot. >> jimmy: you didn't even call? okay, all right. guillermo and i, we haven't just been e eing and drinking o o way through new york, we experienced some culture toto read an article about misty copeland, ballet dancer, are you familiar with misty? she's the first african-american female principal dancer with american ballet theater. i have to say, it reminds me a great deal of myself, she really does. we contacted misty who graciously agreed to give me and my pal guillermo a private lesson that really changed both of our lives in a very dramatic

>> jimmy: thank you. it took 47 years and a hell of a lot of soul searching. but today iinally didiovered that my passion is ballet. >> jimmy: hello. >> guillermo: hi. >> hi. >> jimmy: how you doing, i'm jimmy. >> your legs are real hairy. >> jimmy: you know what, i think that can be a good thing, a little bit of hair in the ballet, right? >> as long as you have a beautiful shape. >> jimmy: well, owns. obviously. >> guillermo: yeah, he does. >> jimmy: people told us we'd never be ballerinas. and we decided to come to you to prove them wrong. >> to prove them wrong. i think i'm the person for that. i don't want to touch what could be a masterpiece. so i want to see what you guys --

>> -- know. position. >> do you want to come around to the bar and show me this way? >> jimmy: why this, right? >> straighten your knees before. on to the bar first. okay. >> you actually have really gorgeous legs. >> guillermo: i've been telling you for life! >> jimmy: you have been saying that. i thought you were kissing my ass. when misty complimented my legs say she has a pretty good body too. you know. for a woman. >> straighten your knees, chest up, chin, plie, straighten. have an idea of what your strengths and weaknenees are. >> jimmy: okay. do i have any weaknesses? besides the body hair? >> um -- yes. >> jimmy: oh, i do, okay, all right. >> we're going to do one simple step before we move into the center. front side, back, and grand -- >> guillermoit looks so easy

when you do it. >> it should look easy. that's why we train for hours and hours our whole lives. >> guillermo: i blame on it him. he took me to lunch, three slice of pizza. >> jimmy: there was a lot of pizza and a calzone. >> that's not acceptable. >> jimmy: as a ballerina you have to watch what you eat. would we be ballerinos? >> you'd be a dancer. there's no sucuc thing as a ballerino. >> jimmy: that seems sexist against guys. >> keep the hips still. >> jimim: your hips don't lie, remember that, guillermo. >> guillermo: beyonce. >> jimmy: shakira. >> i'm nervous about this performance for them. my hope is they don't fall and hurt themselves. and grandmama kick! >> jimmy: grandmama! i think you guys are ready to put on your pointe shoes. >> jimmy: oh, wow! ready to put on our pointe shoes?

all right. >> toolt in. you've got yours in a nice little bow already. >> jimmy: yeah. >> natural. >> jimmy: i learned how to tie my shoes many, many years ago. >> come on up. >> jimmy: thank you. all right. >> guillermo: oh, man, that's hard. >> right. now use the barre as much as you need to to get up on thosese toes. you're going to rise up. up, up. oh, further. oh -- come on. >> guillermo: this is painful. >> jimmy: you look so sad, guillermo. >> guillermo: this is harsh, she's a strict teacher. she was puing us to do more and more. i was my heart was yeah, but my body was no. >> we're going to start with the very first step that the swans do in the second act. you're going to start with the tanlive. and you follow each other around. is that clear? >> jimmy: uh-huh, yeah, i think we got it.

>> guillermo: maybe you. >> five, six, seven, e eht. tanlive and -- you have to move. so he doesn't crush you. keep snaking around. okay. something like that. >> jimmy: i'll be tom live and you be ah tate. >> not exactly. but -- >> jimmy: isn't this good, though? >> oh. um -- no. this is what you guys were doing. >> jimmy: yeah. >> that's not a tomlive. >> guillermo: that was him. >> that was body of you. >> jimmy: misty was nice but tough on us. ballet is a very competitive world. and you just get somebody like me who shows up and is just immediately good at it. >> guillermo: keep doing it, you're doing it! >> jimmy: it had to bother her. she's okay worked at this her whole lave andnd just stroll in and master it. >> um -- keep the legs in front

that looked a little bit like the running man. we've got a little bit more time left before the performance. and i think they're going to be great. i hope. okay. i don't think we're going to get any farther with that stuff. but you came a long way. >> jimmy: yeah, we came from california. >> guillermo: yeah. five hours and a half flying. >> jimmy: flying, yeah. >> we're going to continue to jump. we're going to stand in fifth position. >> guillermo: like that? >> that's third position but one day you'll get to fifth. you're going to jump straight up. you're going to change your et. and that's a change ma. you have to land in fifth position. >> jimmy: one of my testicles is coming out. >> you should keep that to yourself. >> jimmy: i'm trying. it's trying to get off my body. >> okay. >> jimmy: when you dance like i do, every ballet is "the nutcracker." >> two and three and four -- and

going to bow like a ballerina. >> guillermo: this just tightened my penis, i think my testicles are too big for the thing i put over here, i don't know what to call it. too small and the testicles are too big. >> go, change, two, three, four, step side -- and b b. ballet was b bn in italy more than 600 years ago. and today it died. >> jimmy: i think we're ready to dance. >> guillermo: i think we're ready for dinner.

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: misty copeland and american ballet theater. tonight on the show, ryan adams and be right back with bill murray. it's our first night in brooklyn so stick around!

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. we are coming to you from brooklyn, new york. i'd like to thank the new york youth symphony, the dancers from american ballet theater, the

great misty copeland, and my choreographer. i don't know, even as a very gifted choreographer i don't know that he's ever been prouder than tonight of our performance, guillermo, and quite beautifully. >> guillermo: you too, thank you very much. >> jimmy: is in our first night from b.a.m., tonight music from a talented man who covered a taylor swift album. not just a song, the album. it's called "1989." ryan adams from the smirnoff stage. tomorrow night jay-z and donald trump will be live tomorrow. later this week michael j. fox, bradley cooper, joyce behar, robin roberts, howard stern, paul shaffer will be with the cletones, music from the big grams, esperanza, spalding, and public enemy to close out the week. i can't imagine a better way to kick off this week in brooklyn than with a visit from our first guest.

he was able to climb out of a cubs-induced depression to be here. his new movie "rock the casbah" opens in theaters friday. please say hello to bill murray! [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you? i don't know what you're doing but you look great, you really do. it's so great to see you. it's great to see you last night too at the game. are you feeling okay about that? >> yes, i'm feeling okay about last night's game.

>> jimmy: yeah. >> i believe that -- i believe in the words of the song, that you root, root, root for the home team. if they don't win, it's a shame. i feel as a real baseball fan that the ideal scenario is for each home team to win all its games. until the seventh game. then we decide, mas macho. >> jimmy: last night you on the field and the manager of the cubs sent the guy over, joe madden sent the guy over with the lineup card, and said ask bill to touch it. not only did you touch it, you rubbed it all over your body. do you think that is why the cubs lost last night? [ laughter ] >> no. i think we would have won. it's just that i had -- i was wearing too many layers. >> jimmy: layering, it kills you every time. >> it killed me last night. >> jimmy: are you superstitious when it comes to sports or anything? >> we used to blame people that spoke up too loudly during a -- when things would go wrong.

>> how many of you were watching the game last night? [ cheers and applause ] [ go cubs ] >> that works fine here, son. so after about five innings, it's just unusually cold. i'm from chicago so it's not that it was so cold, but it was cold and we hadn't scored any runs. >> jimmy: yes. >> we had the option to go to a place that was considerably warmer so we took the option in the name of changing our luck. >> jimmy: and you did. >> when there's cold weather involved luck is certainly a bigger part of the whole. >> jimmy: i was wondering when you said we should set in different seat in the warmth, if it was superstition or if you were just cold. >> no, i think -- we talked about it, bandied it about. we didn't want to seem not powerful enough or willing to commit. we thought maybe it would change themy joe. >> jimmy: maybe it would have

cold seats, chicago would have prevailed. wind and cold was trying to send you a message, a message that obviously you didn't get. >> it's a seven-game series, jimmy. >> jimmy: you had your sons with you, three of your sons with you. one of your sons is named homer. is that a baseball reference? >> well, his middle name is banks. that is a baseball reference. >> jimmy: for sure, yeah. >> uh-huh. but originally, when -- he was my first born. i had this sort of -- in the superstitious area, i didn't want to sort of like give a name or anything like that to, say, when little jimmy's born, for example, and little jimmy was born with a beard or something like that. you know? so i just thought i'd just call this bump homer. you know? and the doctor said the baby was going to be a female. it was going to be a female child. and when they -- when he was born and they brought him up the

and said, it's a boy. and i said, homer! and homer turned and looked right at me. he heard me talking to him his last few months of his life, he looked right at me. and that was it. >> jimmy: are you sure he wasn't looking at you going, you're not really going to name me homer, are you? kids are very smart. they really are. by the way, your son is a great guy. i was talking to him last night. i said, is everyone in your family -- no one root for the white sox? all cubs fans? >> i have one brother that roots for the white sox and is a listener of rush limbaugh. >> jimmy: homer said because he roots to have the white sox no one talks to him anymore? >> it's not just that. >> jimmy: will you go to the games in chicago? >> we're going to go tomorrow. >> jimmy: going tomorrow. >> i'm supposed to do more work for this movie on wednesday. >> jimmy: which is very funny by wait. we'll show a clip in a moment.

when you go to chicago, how many members of the murray family will ask you for tickets to the game? >> there's no cutoff. you know how it when is someone wants something from you. whether it's a piece of cake or something -- there's always one person that asks for it that has no right to even ask for it. >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know? that person will get to the damn game. it. the key is to not ask you. and then maybe you'll be invited to the game. yea? >> i don't know. we'll see. >> jimmy: i have a theory and that is when the red sox -- >> how come no one else is dressed in dance gear? >> jimmy: you missed your cue, you were supposed to come out at the end. >> i came and -- >> jimmy: do you feel like -- the cubs eventually will win the world series. as long as the human race continues -- >> wow, you're only two games up, jimmy. it's getting ugly. >> jimmy: not this year but eventually it will happen. >> no, it's true. >> jimmy: do you feel like the team -- the fans will lose something when they do? because i feel like the red sox used to be special, and now

they're just another good team. >> i agree. let's talk about the red sox for a second. okay? [ audience: boos ] >> easy, we'll have a lot of time for that. there's a guy on the street with a hat on, we can beat him up. just make sure "b" doesn't stand for brooklyn. you know that's happened too. >> jimmy: do you worry about that, do you fear that? >> the boston red sox used to be the most gracious losers. i was always impressed by how gracious they were in defeat. that they really applauded the other team and how well they played. then they won a couple world series, and now they're unbearable. they're just unbearable fans. something really changed with them. i don't know. they're just a little different. and it's sort of natural. it's like being famous. it's like, so i hope the cub fans don't do that. i hope it doesn't happen. >> jimmy: you're willing to risk it, yes, for a win? >> you know, i think that's a lot to risk. we're going to -- it's going to happen but i think it's a lot to risk.

their sense of themselves. what's interesting is chicago's a beautiful city, the most beautiful city in america, big cities, certainly. there's not that much to burn down anymore. i don't know what the hell we're going to do. >> jimmy: set the lake on fire. >> i don't know what to do. >> jimmy: bill murray is here, "rock the casbah," we'll see it when we come right back. [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by cigna. say ahh and get an annual checkup. learn more at cigna.com/takecontrol. ahh... yeah! ahh... ahh... ah. you probably say it a million times a day. ahh... ahh! ahh... ahh! but at cigna, we want to help everyone say it once a year. say "ahh". >>ahh...

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it all starts with 50% clean energy by 2030. so, what are we waiting for? no. >> i'm sorry -- you don't think -- >> a drain of sand slips into an oyster and irritates the bivalve. what happens this. >> a pearl. >> celine dion. miss nicki minaj. christina aguilera, occasionally. all of them deeply, profoundly irritating.

you, mighty mo, are that irritant. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: bill murray, "rock the casbah." it comes out on friday. what a great character. this is a music manager, this character based on a real person? or group of people? >> it's not based on any real person. it's based on a lifestyle, a lifestyle of sleaze i guess you'd call it. but no, there's a couple people that i saw -- i saw the great bill graham, i saw holly ron dellsner, both these guys at the peak of their insanity and they were fun to watch. >> jimmy: ron dellsner is a local character, he promoted music. not a guy i ever met, you see his name on posters. was ron dellsner like this? i watched the movie, i find it hard to believe -- >> ron dellsner, he's the craziest jewish guy, nutty as hell, says insane things you'd

think he would go to jail for. he doesn't because he's fun 93, really a funny guy. like that, actually. >> yeah, i know. he is just the craziest promoter and has seen more weird stuff. seen every kind of -- like things. they've seen everything so nothing shocks them. like prison guards. >> jimmy: you booked the band for your premiere party tonight, yes? >> yes. that -- yeah, yeah, right. >> jimmy: what is the band? >> i can't -- their name is like chevy chase but not really. they're the hottest band in the world and they played my son's wedding a few weeks ago. they said, we want to have a party. i said, i saw these guys tear up 300 wedding guests and they're fun. >> jimmy: will you dance at the party? >> i danced at the wedding, i don't see how i can avoid this. i was in charge of widows and the criminally insane. dance with. afghanistan, obviously you

didn't shoot there, where did you shoot it there? >> morocco. >> jimmy: morocco. in morocco, do people know you in morocco? the citizenry? >> no. >> jimmy: they do not? >> no. >> jimmy: that's nice. >> it was real nice, very nice. >> jimmy: i would think so. after this movie, you've got a christmas special on netflix. >> i recommend morocco to anyone, i really do, it's really wonderful. >> jimmy: this christmas special -- >> it's a nice -- for like the cowards in the audience, you know who you are. you know, it's like easy, it's entry-level africa and entry-level muslim world. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> they're the most generous kind, normal, nice people. and it's beautiful. it's spectacular. >> jimmy: they like americans there? >> i'm receiving nothing for that, i'm just saying it's nice. >> jimmy: you don't get a rug? >> no, they're really sweet, gentle people. it's a nice place to be. i'd go back there and work any time. i'm sorry. >> jimmy: no, it's all right.

christmas special that you made for netflix. >> right. >> jimmy: "very murray christmas." whose idea was this to make this christmas special? >> turns out it's going to be really good. so there's many, many people taking credit for this thing. >> jimmy: i see. >> there's a lot of people taking credit for it. but there's a bunch of people involved with it. the writer, mitch glazer, also wrote the screenplay for "rock the casbah." sofia copapolacoppola, a hack director i worked with once upon a time. myself, i don't know who else. it's basically -- we were sort of the power trio. >> jimmy: have you ever watched netflix? would you know how to get -- >> i've never seen netflix in my life, i have no idea how to get it. it's unfortunate that i'll never see the show. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: have you ever googled anything? >> yeah. i googled a map. >> jimmy: you google maps?

in the dressing room -- just now someone googled dantal gary. >> jimmy: is that right? and? >> they came up with dante bosso is. i think he's got a restaurant in >> jimmy: is christmas a big holiday for you? >> yeah, christmas is very big. you know, as a catholic, you don't -- there's not -- it often. it's usually a life of penance and suffering. and sin, really. sin mostly. you know, christmas time it comes around. easter you get a bit of candy, a new jacket, sport coat. christmas is the big one, yeah. >> jimmy: when did you come to new york what year? >> i came to new york in 1974. >> jimmy: specifically for "saturday night live"? or before that? >> i came here because i'd run out my clock at second city. i just thought i'd try the brave new world. >> jimmy: we have a photograph. i don't know anything about this picture other than it's you and jane curtin and there's something on your stomach.

do you remember taking this picture? >> yeah, i kind of remember. it happened -- i used to do this thing of sticking out my stomach. i don't know what the hell. and this guy said, you have a really interesting belly button, you have an innie, don't you? that's sort of 50/50. you know? it's not like, wow, you have beautiful hands, are you a hand model? so that ended up getting painted on my stomach in the middle of the night. >> jimmy: this man painted it on your stomach? >> i think he was a man, yeah. [ laughter ] >> then i developed -- they don't have it but i had a cigarette in my mouth. i figured out you could put the cigarette in your belly button. if you sucked it in, it would look like the guy was -- [ cheers and applause ] so that was good for three or four hours. hours and hours of fun. >> jimmy: i hope that makes it into the christmas special. always great to see you. thanks so much for being here. i wish your cubs and the city of

well. >> i love brooklyn, new york. >> jimmy: bill murray. friday. we'll be right back! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by cigna. who wants everyone to say ahh and get an annual checkup. learn more at cigna.com/takecontrol. [music begins. the song, danger zone by kenny loggins plays from the pc] pc does what?! sfx: gently lapping water and seagulls. pc does whaaat?! pc does what no pc has done before. does yours? you know the rules. eggs and sausage. hotcakes and butter. morning fare right?

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*^ >> jimmy: welcome back, we're in brooklyn, new york, the cradle of civilization in the united states, on loan from los angeles. we do our show in l.a. and though we all hoff each other deeply there is a rivalry between the two biggest cities in america, there always has been, probably always will be. where does it come from? based on stereotypes, something we learn? i wanted to explore this topic. we sent a camera crew to talk to kids in cities. we asked kids in l.a. what they think about new yorkers, asked kids in new york on loss angeline knows. the result is this kids' edition

of "new york versus l.a." >> what do you think about people from new york? >> they're kind of cranky sometimes. they kind of ignore you when you go there. >> what have you heard about people from l.a.? >> not really on the bright side there. they're not that bright. >> what are people from l.a. like? >> slow. >> what do you think about people from new york? >> people are crazy. >> what do you think about people from los angeles? >> i think that they're mostly into plastic surgery. because they really want to look perfect. >> what do you think about people from new york? >> very nasty. and people are so -- sometimes weird. >> what kind of nasty things are there? >> like rats. and their baseball team. >> who has the better baseball team, new york or l.a.?

well this year. because remember? mets! >> who's better, mets or dodgers? >> the yankees. >> what do you think about people from l.a.? >> i hate l.a. >> how come? >> because they broke one of the mets' legs. >> what's the worst thing about new york? >> donald trump's there. >> who's the dumbest person in l.a.? >> probably the manager of the l.a. dodgers. >> what do people in new york complain most about? >> maybe that it's too busy. yeah. >> what do you think people in l.a. complain most about? >> that there's too much gluten in the world. >> who's smarter, people in new york or l.a.? >> definitely new york. >> how come you guys are smarter? >> a lot of people know how to do things way faster.

and people grow up way faster. but i age way faster. like today, i was this big. yesterday i was this big. >> oh my gosh. could you do an impression of someone from l.a.? >> sure. look, you want to go shopiiing? let's go shopping. wanna go chasing pennies? oh my god, this is a cute top. >> how do you think people in l.a. top? >> oh, hey, dude, what's up? how's your business grow? i'm good. >> who drinks more, people in new york or l.a.? >> l.a. >> how come? but you can just tell? people are always drunk? are you drunk right now? who's the dumbest person in l.a.? >> yeah, kim kardashi. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]

with ryan adams!

tt2w`tif`n$) bt@q+yx >> dicky: music in brooklyn on

to you by smirnoff. exclusively for everyone. please drink responsibly. >> jimmy: i'd like to thank bill murray and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of everything for him. "nightline" is next. but first, this is his version of an album by taylor swift. it's called "1989," here with the song "welcome to new york," ryan adams! walking through a crowd the village is aglow kaleidoscopef loud heartbeats under coats everybody here wanted something more searching for a sound we hadn't heard before so welcome to new york

welcome to new york it's been waiting for you welcome to new york say, it's a new soundtrack i could dance to this beat beat forever more the lights are so bright but they never blind me me when we first dropped our bags on apartment floors took our broken hearts put them in a drawer everybody here was someone else before and you can want who you want boys and boys and girls and girls so welcome to new york it's been waiting for you welcome to new york welcome to new york it's been waiting for you welcome to new york welcome to new york it's a new soundtrack i could dance to this beat beat forever more the lights are so bright but

me me like any great love it keeps you guessing like any real love it's ever changing like any true love it drives you crazy but you wanna change anything anything

[ cheers and applause ] * this is "nightline." >> tonight, defying the odds. born without most of his brain, now baby jackson is a year old medical miss mystery. his parents open up about their story and the backlash they faced for their difficult decision. monica the medium. she says she's like any other college student for one thing -- >> i talk to the dead. >> what really goes on inside a private session? despite the skepticism, what she said that made our correspondent do a double take. >> crazy! the force awakens.